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FOR THE SOUL

In 2 months time it will be my dads 1 year anniversary that he left me for heaven. So I thought it about time with almost a year gone by, I share how losing someone close has changed me. Who knows maybe it will help someone else who is in a time of grief, or maybe if you are lucky enough to have not lost anyone it will help you appreciate and make the most of every day of your life.

Firstly, these photos were taken in the first few days of Jan 2015 on Summer holidays in my most favourite place and on my most favourite beach in the world Busselton in the South West of WA. I am lucky enough that my Mum & Dad built us a holiday house in this beautiful little town. It was their dream home to spend many holidays and retirement in. They had the block of land for 30 years while raising my 3 brothers and I and then finally were able to build the beautiful beach house 5 years ago and we spent many holidays and weekends enjoying family time right infront of the beautiful bay. All these holidays now treasured memories. It was Dads favourite place to be “seeing the sunset over the horizon” as he said to me in his hospital bed. The day before these photos were taken we released Dad’s ashes out into the sea right infront of our beach house and it was just magic – no words can explain.

After my dad died after my intense grief I made small changes to my life to help me cope. A lot of people have commented how “strong” I am and I always dismissed It saying “you would be too if it happened to you, you just keep going on” but now when I look back I do a lot of little things every day to keep me happy. Because if I’m not happy the grief will overcome me and I will not look at dads death in the most positive way I can.

As many people say when someone dies, dads death changed my whole world and my life will never be the same again. I wish everyday I could have him back but his death gave my life more meaning, it gave me more soul and I am a deeper wholer person and I continue to learn from it every day.

I had always heard how good yoga was but never tried it. Well now was the perfect time and I absolutely love it. I’m sure everyone knows the benefits of yoga and for a person going through grief they are ten times fold, I am not flexible at all (or strong!!) but its not even about that for me. I’ve been going almost a year now and after a yoga class I feel exactly what they say stress relief, inner peace, increased energy and living with greater awareness.

I exercise every day whether it be a walk or run with my dog and some circuit exercises. And I’m sure you all know the benefits of exercise and all the happy endorphins you get after it..perfect for someone trying to cope with grief, it forces you to feel good even if you don’t want to because your hearts sad inside!. This gave me more energy so I went to bed earlier and got up earlier waking before my alarm.I’ve never had a gym membership, I love being outdoors in nature with fresh air and sun on my face it’s a good cure for anything.

I started to drink less and eat fresher. I spent many years partying way too hard with my friends and getting the most awful hangovers (I would literally throw up for 24 hrs) and after dad died I would get over emotional if I drank and feeling bad with a hangover the next day just makes your grief worse, it wasn’t making me happy so I stopped.

I started reading more and meditating and I feel good. I do know if I go to bed late, eat bad, miss my exercise I am not as happy as I can be so sticking to these things helps me.

Being down by the sea and going for a swim as much as I can also helps me, there is no feeling in the world like diving under a wave and hearing and seeing nothing at all for a moment while your immersed under water and then coming back up into the world with fresh breath and salty skin..its intoxicating, awakens your soul and I’m sure is a cure for many things.

There is no question I still feel pain, sometimes I’ll just be driving the car and I’ll be taken right back to sitting by my dads bedside in his dying days and I block it. I block it to be able to cope and I do these things every day to keep me happy to be able to cope and to make the most of being alive every day. One day I hope I wont have to block it but for now this is how I cope.

So almost one year on and I think I’m doing o.k and I’m happy, because how could you not be in this beautiful world and because I know dad would want me to be.

Below are some of my favourite quotes.

“We know that one does not come through grief unscathed. What we fully dont recognise is the power we have, after the first grief has passed, to choose what we are going to make of ourselves bereft though we are. There are people who after a devastating loss reshape their lives in heroic terms. We have choices to make and as survivors of crisis we have new strength, new power – if we chose to claim them”.

“The soul always knows what to do to heal itself. The Challenge is to silence the mind”

“There are only two ways to live your life, one is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as if everything is”

“With freedom, books, flowers and the moon, who could not be happy”

Love Naomi XXX

OUTFIT DETAILS

This Spell Byron Bay dress was perfect for this shoot, you feel so beautiful wearing it with its length and colours.

My hat is from Ace Of Something the colouring is the simply perfect.

Photos by my Wonderful Husband who also contributes daily to my happyness in a way he will never know.

Comments

  1. This was a beautiful story, I’m so sorry for your loss. I think it’s amazing that it has taken you to more beautiful, soulful places. Thank you for sharing your story.

    Alex x

  2. This is a truly inspiring post nay. You really are one of the strongest people I know – even if you don’t feel like it sometimes!
    So proud to be your friend, we have had many silly times and even though our friendship is based on having fun and joking around its always nice to be reminded that you have a very deep soulful side! Thanks for this, it made me feel better than I was! xx

  3. Hi Naomi
    I’ve only just stumbled across your blog today but I am so grateful that I did.
    My dad suddenly passed away in March this year, I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye. I have good days and I have bad days but ultimately I just keep getting up in the morning and appreciating the day for what it is.
    I too have completely cut back on drinking, it’s amazing how an event can suddenly change those little habits and make you consider the things that are a waste of time ie. Being hungover. Anyway, to the point, You have now inspired me to take up yoga. I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of it before. I’m off to hunt for yoga classes in my area right now.
    I’m so glad I found you today.
    Caity x

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